As an introvert, I've always found hellos to be bit awkward. There's the look, you know the one we all give, the one that says we've already decided everything there is to know about you in one once over. Yes, that look. Don't be ashamed. Own it if you do it. Then there's that moment you reach out your hand to officially meet the new face in front of you and then your voice shakes ever so slightly...hi, I'm.
There you did it. You said hello. Maybe it wasn't as awkward for you as it was for me, but let's be real. Do you still remember my name?
Oh, you don't?
That's right. Hi. I'm Brittany and this is our awkward virtual handshake. Welcome to our perfectly messy life. Let's get the introductions over with quickly. Believe me, I hate them as much as you (mostly because I'm not very good at them).
I'm a former PR professional turned stay-at-home mom. I'm a Christ follower with an amazing husband and a 20 month old son, but here is where it gets a little messy. In the last year, we have experienced three miscarriages. There will be plenty more on that later. And while I'm trying not to let our losses define me, I have found that writing about my three sweet angels makes my heart a little less sad and my head a little less crazy.
So, why start airing our business for the world to read? Well, my better half might be asking the same thing, but the best reasoning I can come up with is that each one of my pregnancies and children (living or in heaven) is worth talking about.
Why didn't I start this a year ago? Why, I'm glad you asked. I wasn't ready. Nothing more. Nothing less. I don't know if your heart ever fully heals from such loss, but I know time is slowly mending my once broken heart and soul.
The truth is, I just wasn't myself. My husband could probably shed more light on that topic, but for now we'll just say I had lost sight of who I was and wanted to be. Now don't take your mind down a deep, dark path. I'm very lucky in that sense. The type of self I'm talking about is part of my daily, monotonous routine. I was stuck and I couldn't stay that way much longer.
Ultimately, we made some major life changes, hence the stay-at-home mom part. Don't get me wrong. I loved the work I did and the companies I was able to work for, but sometimes you have to step back and re-evaluate in order to make the best decisions (for you and those around you).
I'm sure you'll get to know me more as I begin this journey into blogging with a somewhat anonymous readership. Hi, mom! I promise to be real. After all, life isn't perfect. So, welcome. Welcome to Our Perfectly Messy Life.
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